Misadventures In A Parallel Universe
by krazifreak
Summary: You think the Thirteenth Order is JUST a bunch of bad guys? Well you are wrong! They have their own misadventures. From Saix's reverse berserk to Marluxia's selective reading. And many more where that came from! Based off of Org XIII Randomz Comics


**NEW STORY**

**And one without OCs FTW :D (Unless you count their Somebodies as OCs)**

**Warning: Hinted yaoi, XemSainess, OOCness, and all that jazz**

**Disclaimer: All Characters belong to Tetsuya Nomura.**

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Misadventures In A Parallel Universe

Chapter 1

Chaos.

That's all there ever is in The World That Never Was. From a red head pyromaniac burning the lesser minions and setting the couch on fire to an old man with an eyepatch and a California King surfer accent shooting people from odd angles in the middle of the air. It amazed many people how twelve men, many between the ages of what appeared to be at least 15, 16, 17-45 or older and one single woman could live in the same house without killing each other. Of course, anyone who thinks these things are probably dead or a heartless/nobody for even knowing of their existence (or in this case, nonexistence).

But today was a somewhat different day.

Xemnas, a young dashing man with dark tan skin, silver locks that defied the laws of gravity and amber eyes that could pierce the soul, was sound asleep at his King sized bed. His head was hidden beneath the silver silk covers and a pillow about to fall behind the bed. His alarm began to sound, which was the last thing he wanted at the moment. He slowly began to get up to put the snooze on, but recalled that he still had work to do before the day was done. With a slight groan, he turned of his alarm and slowly got out of bed. His hair was somewhat mangled, his eyes still heavy with sleep. The only thing he had on was his long black and white pants which resembled his final form's coat. He slowly stood up to stretch and made his way over to his private washroom to get ready for the long day ahead of him.

He had a feeling today would be a day of chaos.

After freshening up and getting dressed in his normal black cloak and boots, he made his way to the kitchen. Once there, he looked around at his fellow colleagues. Xaldin, his Third in Command, was flipping another pancake in the air. He always saw Number III as the only 'normal' Organization XIII member, not including the fact that he has massive sideburns that look like they could take over an entire word if they had a free will. Though the sideburns were never that thick when Xaldin was still Dilan, his Somebody.

At the table, he saw his Second In Command, Xigbar, drinking his normal coffee and toast while reading the newspaper. He had known him since before the Hollow Bastion takeover, when they were still Somebodies. Braig. His close friend. Of course, the loss of their hearts did not change Xigbar's personality or appearance. The only difference was that Braig was a brunette, while as now Xigbar has Black hair with grey streaks, showing that he had indeed aged, regardless of his California King accent.

Next to Xigbar was Vexen, the organization's dedicated scientist. Originally Even, the only thing that's changes was the length in hair. Vexen was currently looking at a formula he had written down and seeing if he had made any mistakes as he took another sip of his iced coffee. Many thought Vexen was some type of crazy old coot who would do unholy things to anyone younger than him. Of course, this fact was completely false. Unless you count Number XI, but if you don't, he is somewhat normal.

Next to Vexen was Lexaeus as he played with a rubix cube, and Zexion, reading his usual book. Ever since they were Elaeus and Ienzo, they were hardly seen apart. Many say they are merely childhood friends because of their many similarities. Which could be true if Lexaeus wasn't that much older than Zexion. But that's a story for another day.

And finally was- wait. There was an empty seat where his favourite organization member was to sit. There were many other empty seats, but he knew Numbers VIII-XIII were still sound asleep. Those fools always sleep til noon. Xemnas was a bit confused that his 'self claimed Second In Command' was not present, since he was usually awake and working before anyone else in the organization. But he quickly brushed that aside. _'Must have been working late last night.'_ He walked into the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee. Two cubes of sugar as always. He took a nice long sip and remembered what it felt like to feel relaxed.

"Now this is good coffee. Hot and black- Like my soul." He gave a slight nod to Xaldin as a way to say he liked his home brewed coffee. Xaldin slightly bowed in response and continued to clean up the mess. After that, Xaldin and Xigbar went to the GameRoom Of Nonexistence to relax. Vexen got up to go to his office near Xemnas' to grab some more notes before returning to his lab. Lexaeus and Zexion went for the library to continue with their silent reading and puzzle solving. To make it short, Xemnas was left alone in the kitchen.

Or so he thought.

Behind him, a dark, shadowed figure slinked its way along the pearl white walls, moving at fast speeds. Xemnas, oblivious to the intruder, raised his mug for another sip of the pure black coffee. But that sweet sip of energy never made it passed his lips.

"XEMY-PYUU!!!"

Xemnas, in complete shock of the sudden noise in the silence, dropped his mug. As it shattered on the floor, coffee spreading along the no-longer white floor, Xemnas turned around to a horrifying sight. There was his self proclaimed second in command. Saïx. But at the same time, it couldn't be Saïx. The Saïx he knew was an uptight man who never slouched. He always had a stern, uncaring look on his face. A man that knew his place and never refused an order or betrayed his Superior.

The boy in front of him was not the Saïx he knew. This boy had a smile that could resemble the smile of a five year old boy who just got a beebee gun for Christmas. A smile that could resemble a girl who won first place in the Little Miss Sunshine. A smile that could resemble Axel's expression when he accidentally walked in on Roxas has he was undressed. Yes. I went there.

Blue hair tied up in pink bows, glimmering eyes that looked like gold diamonds, a kidish expression, and a posture that looked like Demyx as he watched the PowerPuff Girls marathon. If you used to watch those old Bugs Bunny or Tom And Jerry Cartoons, then you can imagine the expression on Xemnas' face. Eyes bugged out, jaw wide open. Completely speechless for a moment. And that's saying a lot when it comes to Xemnas.

"S-Saïx?! What the hell happened to you?! You look like you came out of Axel's closet!" he finally managed to say. Not something he would normally say, or even proper to say. But he said something to express what he should be feeling none the less.

"Don't be silly1" Saïx said in a childish tone, "Marly-kun and LarLar gave me a makeover, Xemy-chan! Do you like it?"

Xemnas wasn't sure of what to be more shocked about. The fact that his most serious underling had pink ribbons in his hair, the fact that he just spoke in a childish tone, or the fact he just used wapanese. Finally it dawned on him of what he said. _'Marly-kun? LarLar? Xemy-chan?!' _Those names were just creepy coming from a blue haired guy with a scar on his face. But in a way, it was somewhat cute.

Saïx quickly lost interest when Xemnas remained silent and saw a bee fly by. Must have come from Marluxia's garden. Saïx quickly sprinted after it, careful not to get stung.

Xemnas watched as Number VII skipped away. He looked down at the shattered mug on the now coffee stained floor. Another mess to clean up.

"I knew I should have stayed in bed."

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**Thats Chapter one! R&R**

**PEACE! **


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